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Writer's pictureDuduzile R Skosana

State of Independence

What is independence?? Which metrics do we use to measure independence? how far should independence go? How does independence influence relationships? And for curiosity does independence differ by gender? According to Cambridge dictionary - Independence is the ability to live your life without being helped or influenced by other people. Our definition of independence might differ based on how you view it. We are different because we have differing views and opinions on things and that is what makes life and people interesting. 

I am a person who attach emotions and feelings in everything even when it is unnecessary but bare with me on this one, it might not make sense now but it will all come together at the end. According to your sincerely Duduzile Skosana, independence is having the ability to choose independently. It is having the ability to stand alone and still make choices without the influence of the person you are dependent on.


Independence is retaining your own sense of ownership. I feel like when you are depending on someone there's always gonna be a way they influence how you do things. They will influence your choices and behaviors even without your consent or you will do it subconsciously without realizing because you are depending on that person. I don't believe the society should influence how you measure your independence, like i said we are all different and how we view things is different. I measure independence based on the extant to retain or be who you are without being influenced by someone whom you feel dependent on. It is like having your total freedom of choice and decision making. I don't think independence negatively influence relationships because when you are being your self and standing for your own truth you will find your compliment. When you are independent you won't settle for anything less than what you want. Independence helps people take decision according to what they want or love, not according to the benefits they get from being with that person.

In the past years we have seen a drastic change in our society where women have been seen taking space and claiming their independence. I am proud of all the women who go out everyday to do their own thing and doing everything in their power to be independent. This shows that we are actually moving forward and recognizing that everyone should be independent.



Holly Riordan of thought catalog wrote on her blog post published January 19th 2018 about what it mean to be an independent women, she said it is more than making money - it is about your energy, your strength and it is about being comfortable to do things on your own.

But being independent doesn't mean you don't need people in your life, but it means having the ability to stand on your own even when you have people. Independence doesn't mean you have to be rude and cold to people. It definitely doesn't mean you have to build walls and high fences to prevent people from coming in.


Independence is a trait that, regardless of who or what may enter your life, will allow you to remain true to your values and achieve all of your dreams - Yarika Cohen
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